Another post. i feel a little bit as though i am on the verge of a breakdown. i'm practically crying all the time, and i never ever cry. i even cried in college on monday which i haven't done since i was like five :(
I'm pretty sure it's because of the not eating. anyway, i'd rather be thin.
Today i'm going to eat hopefully a little less than a normal person. however, it shouldn't be hard to eat less than i have done the last few days. at the shop where i work my mum lent a customer something and wouldn't accept any money for it. the woman left, but came back five minutes later with like five cream cakes! there were only three of us in the shop too, i had two :'( and on friday i ate like a heifer at my dad's house. i did well in the day though, i only had one piece of peperoni cause my friends had pizza at lunch. so i'm only doing a two day fast this week. i do know that i can do this because i've done it before (although i did have an innocent smoothie in the middle, and if i'm honest if ia ctually ate fruit which is basically the same i'm class it as breaking the fast) i'm just gonna drink shit loads of fruit juice. i'm gonna buy orange juice on monday, then use the bottle to fill it with apple and pear juice on tuesday. drink loads of water and a bit of coffee in between!
i'm looking forward to it.

i was kind of putting all my hope on last week, i never really thought about the fact i can try again. i kind of hope i fail because if i do i'll feel even more determined to do it again the next week. i get in to routines very easily though, if i keep it up it'll sink in every week. then i'll lose weight!
last night i was at my friends and kept commenting on how fat i felt (i was drunk) and they all kept saying that i was skinny adn my friend rory in the night was like "hannah, you are actually thin" and it was clear he'd been thinking about it and stuff. i dunno, made me a bit worried i might have brought awareness to my weight issues but also kind of liked that he still felt the need to tell me i'm skinny.

i'll  end this now then do another post with pictures.

Lucy, i've got flu also :( get well soon <3